Left Coast Voices

"I would hurl words into the darkness and wait for an echo. If an echo sounded, no matter how faintly, I would send other words to tell, to march, to fight." Richard Wright, American Hunger

She Hates Mother’s Day

I am a big admirer of local author, Anne Lamott. Along with a number of novels, Anne has also written what many writers consider one of the top How-to books on the market, Bird-By-Bird.

She seems a stable, level-headed woman at first glance, until you discover that she hates Mothers Day.

“…Mother’s Day celebrates a huge lie about the value of women: that mothers are superior beings, that they have done more with their lives and chosen a more difficult path.”

“I hate the way the holiday makes all non-mothers, and the daughters of dead mothers, and the mothers of dead or severely damaged children, feel the deepest kind of grief and failure. The non-mothers must sit in their churches, temples, mosques, recovery rooms and pretend to feel good about the day while they are excluded from a holiday that benefits no one but Hallmark and See’s.”

But before you think that she is picking on Mums, don’t worry. She hates Valentines Day as well. This is a must read article, especially if you know a woman who isn’t a mother, or who is estranged from her children.  Or maybe someone who’s mother is dead. She also needs a hug and would happily share a drink with a non-judging friend, who wants to be with them for who they are and not the title they hold.

Oh, and if you’re reading – Happy Mother’s Day, Mum!


Alon Shalev is the author of The Accidental Activist (now available on Kindle) and A Gardener’s Tale. He is the Executive Director of the San Francisco Hillel Foundation, a non-profit that provides spiritual and social justice opportunities to Jewish students in the Bay Area. More on Alon Shalev at http://www.alonshalev.com/and on Twitter (#alonshalevsf).

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